It’s been a very long time since I blogged or even visited this site. Sorry about that. Sometimes the words just dry up and there is nothing left to say. Other times words flow like a waterfall. Right now, there is a trickling or words flying in my brain. So, we’ll go with it.
Our church has just begun a 21 day fast. It’s designed to get us to slow down, re-focus, and regain our passion. But, it’s not merely to regain or restore anything. I think what we all want is an increased capacity for God in our lives. We want to press beyond what we think our limits are, and dare to request more.
“Dare to request more.” If you have read my blog, you’ve probably heard me reference Francis Chan. He is an author and pastor with a heart for the Trinity unlike many that I have ever seen. I am re-reading his book “Forgotten God“. It is a book that explores our relationship, or lack thereof, with the Holy Spirit and His action or inaction in our lives. Reading it this time around, I’m finding it challenging on many different fronts. In the 2nd chapter of the book, he explores some reasons why we are often reticent to open ourselves up to the move of the Holy Spirit. The first reason is public perception, meaning we are afraid of what others would think about us. We function and operate so much within labels in these times. We want everything to fit into a nice little box that we can pack away neatly. We want to say that we are what we are. We want so say what God is. We want God, but only the God who won’t cause us embarrassment or who won’t get us labeled as radicals or weirdos. We want God, but on our terms, which in effect means that we really don’t want Him. The fact is that God doesn’t fit into a nice little box. We can not pack Him away. We can not dictate to Him what we will and won’t do with our lives. We’re either all in or not in at all. God dislikes lukewarm stuff.
So, why do we worry so much about what people think about us versus what God thinks about us? I’ve been asking myself that question the last couple of days and an answer is starting to come to me. Our peers ans society are more real to us than God is. That is a painful truth. I mean, we can see our friends and family. We can see their faces when we fly off of the handle. We can hear the whispers and interpret the stares. But God is this great invisible “being”. We pray to Him and talk to Him sometimes, but we don’t have to see His displeasure. We can make believe that He is pleased with us and interpret His word to fit our attitudes and behaviors. He is not real enough to us, and therein lies the problem. We can only begin pleasing God and following after Him when He becomes real to us. I would add that God must become the realest thing in our entire lives. We must be able to perceive Him, because unless we can, he becomes no different than a childhood imaginary friend. I honestly believe, and am striving, to make God so real in my life that I don’t notice what others say and think about me. I want God to be so real in my life that His presence overrides what I think about myself. We can’t be wrapped up in others and expect God to be satisfied with the scraps. Inversely, when we become wrapped up completely in God, He moves through us to affect the very ones that we were formerly concerned about.
Chan’s second point had to do with us being afraid that God won’t do what He says that He will do. Basically, we are afraid that God will fail. Check out this quote from the book:
“I think the fear of God failing us leads us to ‘cover for God’. This means we ask for less, expect less, and are satisfied with less because we are afraid to ask for or expect more. We convince ourselves that we don’t want more- that we have all the ‘God’ we need or could want. I can’t imagine how much it pains God to see His children hold back from relationship with the Holy Spirit because of fear that He won’t come through”- Francis Chan from Forgotten God
We deal in disappointment. We come to expect it. We never forget it. It’s like that one big toy that you wanted for Christmas as a child, that Santa never brought for you. It stays with you. And I know that we all have prayed prayers that we have not seen answered. After a while, we feel like we have to protect God and as Chan says, we expect less. Instead of seeking God for the fullness of His Spirit, we learn to live as paupers when God has created us so live as Kings and Queens. Our own spirits begin to shrivel, because it needs God’s fullness. It was created to experience a daily diet of what God can only provide for it. In truth, God never fails. He is never slack concerning His promises. What we can not afford to do is pray to God for our wants, and then blame Him when He sees our needs differently than our wants. He has promised what He has promised. In addition to that, He has not promised that He shall deviate from his plans for our lives simply because we see something superficial that we just have to have. I think this is a part of spiritual maturity that can come slowly for us and hinder us if we are not careful. We throw temper tantrums and then give God the silent treatment. This can not happen. We will never fully receive the Spirit of God with this kind of attitude. Whatever disappointments we feel God has caused us, we have to understand what Jeremiah 29:11 says to us. God has a plan that will cause us success and give us a great future. We have to hold fast to this!
I want the Holy Spirit to have His way in my life. This is what I am actively praying for during our fast. No matter where He has to take me, and what has to happen, I want His Holy Spirit to be the realest thing on earth to me. And yes, I will admit that this thought is frightening, but living life without the Holy Spirit at work in me is a far more frightening prospect.
Anyway, that’s all for now folks. be blessed!
